Superstar condition...(making up for days lost)
SO the christians freed me nearly three days ago now.
My lord children, was I a sorry bloke! 7 pounds lighter, whiter and whiter...and all the while consuming nothing but aqua. My stetson therefore is tipped to the great Thai nurses at Chiang Mai McCormick hospital who set me up with a grand place of lodging and got this oy a decent nights rest (did I mention they had MTV)

Look at me now. And how we've been catching up on those two wasted days. After one day of farting around, we rented some scooters from Julie Guesthouse ad learned to maneover our hogs through the bustling streets of Chiang Mai. There is no better way to learn that craft then to start on the left hand side of the rode and try to avoid the other 4-5000 scooters ahead and behind you. This is the town to scoot!
We got to the highway by midday, and headed to the Doi suthep mountain, where apparently a white elephant croaked in the 1500's. But more importantly, where sister Meg married her handsome beau Kent...I should mention there are 306 step to get to the Chedi at the top, so all you wedding planners go for a short train, and maybe remember NO shoes!
Then to Chiang Mai zoo, where we set our eyes on our first Tapir...who just so happens to adorn our Phobun banner at the bottom of your screen. I've given up on the sloth now...for sure the Tapir is my favorite animal. That is not to take away from the Pandas, something I have not seen since the hay day Calgary 88. Ahhh...I can hear that olympic song playing as I type. Thanks David Foster.
after I had overheated my bike (who knew you couldn't leave it in fourth gear to go up a mountain) the scooter gave me a little tattoo when I leaned the exhaust pipe againgst my calf. It's a good looking burn...not too bad, but story worthy? we will see.
Now that was an excellent day but it really didn't match with the last two. WE arranged to go on a two day trek to the Lahu village, and the Mae tang river. After five gruelling hours of trekking up and down red dirt paths in the 30 degree heat, and swearing (ask brant) that "I'd stay in the shade and read a book next time" the fruits of our labour fell before us.
It happened at a waterfall, which today is about a 10th the size of what it is during peak season, but big enough to shower in and bowl us over. Then to an encampment where our very "loose cannon" leader Mok, entertained us with stories of opium dealers in Lahu village (one was shot down there ust yesterday by the DEA) and his penchant for honey which nearly got the five of us with more than mosquitos to worry about.
Then this morning, my birthday. I woke up in a jungle next to a swimmable river, ate some salty eggs (as prepared by Mok) and went for an hour log elephant ride, which I would suggest only to those who can
a)stand mild cruelty to giant beasts
and B)get compeletly covered in snot and dust...
we were on a heffer who had a penchant for snorting towards it's occupants, and her baby came along for the ride. I must say you haven't seen quite anything until youv'e seen a baby elephant bathing in a cool river. He literally would stand and fall over sideways into the stream...JOY.
But enough water for elephant, what about Us???
Yes, we thought it might be nice to get on a raft and hit a little class 5 white water rapids (more like 1 or a half) got drenched and mosied down the rest of the river on a calm bamboo raft.
that more or less catches us up to right now.
Back on track and in fine birthday condition to enjoy a bottle of bacardi (that i smuggled all this way from victoria) on the rooftop bar five stories over Chiang Mai.
I do believe I'll be spending the rest of this day with one of the finest gents in the business...My life partner Brant, without whom ( and I must say this) I would have been in sorry condition some 4 days ago.
He's really grrreat you know.

not as great as Mok, but he knows that.
Oh yeah, and I know you must all be wondering after reading the last 1/2hour drivel wether we survived the recent Earthquake ot not. NEVER FEAR ALL IS SWELL!
- posted by Combine Harvester @ 1:59 AM 2 comments

 
Elephants ages 3mo. to 89yr.

We'll have a hard time beating the elephant kraal in Ayutthaya, It seemed a surprise to the very butch volunteer elephant keeper Eva that we found the place at all. In truth if you mention Elephant to any tuk tuk driver in those parts as we did, they quickly usher you to some sort of roadside elephant tour...hmmm chained baby elephants. We were not impressed, we can go shriner at home if we want that.
But the Kraal...UNBELIEVABLE. They house 80 elephants there and throught the tutelage and very kind guidance of Eva we were ushered to the Oliver stone wall (of shame if you ever saw Alexander, I did not, but we met the stars just the same) and off to meet the oldest and youngest habitants of the litter.
We met 89 year old Dokma, and got a good rub of her snout...and then to the 3 month old, whose name never really stuck (it was in thai after all) I don't know about you gang but I have never touched an elephant let alone feed one, and play with it's baby. Great pictures to follow.
Brant and I agree if something beats the elephant petting zoo (and something prolly will) we will be sure to exclaim some crazy codeword...(word has yet to formalize.)
Now we're in Sukkotthai...half way between Bangkok and Chiang Mai...the illness has all but dissappeared which was by the grace of god after 6 hours on a 2nd class bus today with babys asleep on my lap...


well that was sincere enough wasn't it/bUn.
your turn Brant.
- posted by Combine Harvester @ 4:27 AM 1 comments

 
anyone for an MRI or perhaps a rendition of "GOD SAVE THE QUEEN"
So...now we're in the midst of it.
We're staying at U.P. Inn for 200 baht a night. private shower. private room...which is great because....
Ged's seen the worst of this trip, he prays. He had to cast my Union Jack boxers into the tampon dispenser some 24 hours ago due to a very messy wake up call...be assured he's as content to post it since bedwetting has never been a problem b4 now. Just the same there has been no reason to raise the alarm, he's on the road to recovery in sleepy Ayutthaya, a word we've repeated a zillion times to get the inflection just right. It goes I--TIYA...we believe. WE went to the best damned wat yet last night and became minor celebrities with the tourbus teenagers from Bangkok, and surrounding thailand. After the 12 some pictures we had to find a way out.
There was an in depth article in the Bangkok Post today about Canada's flailing health care system, and would you believe Ralph Kleins heroed attempts to save it...I read the thing straight through...There was even a picture of an MRI machine in a Calgary independent medical office...I\ll steal the article later today so when I'm feeling homesick later in the journey I can strip off all my clothes under a cool fan and stare at the MRI machine...believe me I'll be thinking of every one of you when I'm looking at the nurse control that machine.

There is some debate between Brant and myself as to how we will post on this thing, I started in the third person which seems to fly, after all brant doesn't want to be mistaken for someone who shits his pants. But I'm sure given the nuances of our writing styles you'll figure us out.
The ring two sucked big apples. It was cool though, because in Thailand you stand an honour the King after 30min of ads and before the movie...also the projectionist got the reels mixed up so we watched the first part, then the third, then the second, and then the Biting conclusion...If it wasn\t such a crap movie we would have complained to the people who wouldn't know what we were saying.
Everything is gravy in Ayutthaya...we're off on a wat journey.
shabba.
- posted by Combine Harvester @ 8:21 PM 1 comments

 
SOMEWHERE IN THE MALL OF AMERICA!!!

Time to take a break in the MOST and LEAST westernized location on earth. Every floor of this interconnected 4 mall mega-plex provides PHo and BuN hours of candy for the eyes and ears. Can't say Ged's feeling top notch and so we are Air conditioned and totally relaxed. If we came here the first day, we would have stayed until now. It's a good thing then that we didn't cause our dark olive skinned tans are getting real SPANK.
Brant is a JU-ON.
Punks in Bangkok are clean.
The night ladies on Koshan wore green last night..."lucky lucky four leaf clover"
WE met a drunken Scot, who informed us he was married, and since getting to Bangkok weeks ago had been with many "prairie girls". Brant responded..."are we your priest?" and he walked on...
Next stop Ayyuthya. 2 hours North.

MaH BOKYEEONGG!
- posted by Combine Harvester @ 11:18 PM 1 comments

 
Bangkok...day3
We have been in a plane for 20 hours or so, only to find no baggage in bagkok.
Only a very freindly Thai man who promises us closure on the issue by tomorrow at this time...we're anticipating he is correct.
All is well though, this place is VERY DIFFERENT. If it weren't for our clouded minds we would have easily lost them.
No ammount of reading or prep could make you feel anything but out of your skin.
a few observations thus far...
We have seen alot of cats without tails.
Sometimes the strange man watching you try to figure out a pay phone really just wants to help and lend you his cell phone.
Sometimes the taxi driver really does get lost.
we must go now and find some clothes at the night market.
- posted by Combine Harvester @ 4:06 AM 4 comments

 
What we are.
We were Ged, and Brant...
No we are PHO, BuN.
- posted by Combine Harvester @ 4:06 PM 0 comments